Wednesday, January 28, 2009

she did not choose me....

to start some random thoughts....

i go to starbucks every morning monday thru friday...if cade is running late, and therefore izzy is running late for school or little gym, i still go wait in the drive thru. i can not imagine making it through the day without my cup of joe. i can picture my bnl adding up the tally now...that is 3.73 a day times five times how many weeks of school a year. i figure i have really not been able to drink in the past three years, i don't smoke, or carry any other bad habits. my shopping habit is focused on the girls because well, why would i buy my larger self a bunch of clothes. i have not really started any remodeling projects in the new house. and i work a lot of hours...without much of a "personal" pay so i DESERVE my addiction to starbucks. i guess the downside is annie is now wanting to have a milk box like her big sister. luckily, i am able to fool her by pretending to poor my coffee into her "milk cup" and she is falling for it!

i only like really crisp apples..if it does not crunch but gives just the slightest bit of mush in the bite i want to spit it out. sadly, the last few apples i have cut have given into the mush.

when jeff leaves with the laptop i am totally lost. yesterday we stayed in all day waiting for the ice storm. jeff gave the guys the day off (may have had something to do with him staying up on the computer till almost 3am the night before). we did have one of our guys 360 two years back and hit an overpass......so that is the official reason. i literally spent 4 hours or more on the computer yesterday while the girls napped or played. i am addicted to the word challenge game on facebook. it was a real accomplishment to get into the top three than finally last week i hit the number one spot only to be bumped down by my bnl in less than two days and i know he has not been playing this game like i have...jeff is leaving for new orleans today and probably taking the laptop so i must use it until he leaves, meaning no food or diaper changes for the girls. i must insist we get another lap top...i mean the computer in the office is for work, right?

my youngest child will eat for an hour if her high chair is parked in the living room especially at breakfast. she loves mickey mouse and handy manny.....i am sure i will receive a comment or two about how i am teaching her bad eating habits but whatever it gives me a moment to wake up and have quiet thoughts or like today write on my blog.

so, the girls have been battling colds. monday morning we rushed them to their doctor for a "nose swap" to ensure they did not have rsv, a severe virus with breathing problems, coughing and just plain ole misery. we were exposed twice last week by two different people so the chances were high. luckily, the prognosis was negative.....however, they do have a bonafide cold. last night annie woke up around 10 with a little hacking and once i picked her up she began the gag mechanism that results in vomit. jeff had
jumped up from the chair and met me half way to catch in his 6ft 4in hands the results of the gag....thank goodness because i have a very weak stomach and would have turned around with the gag reflex myself. once we had annie calmed down and cleaned up i tried to sit down on the couch to cuddle her. she started waling.....and squirming....which is very normal for her, however, once i put her down she ran, yes ran, to jeff and let him pick her up. she curled up in his arms and was asleep in minutes. i could not even concentrate on nip tuck after this....i know i have complained in the past because i have had to do everything for izzy, she always wants mommy, but to actually have one of my babies choose to go to dad over me....i did not know it would hurt so much. now, don't get me wrong i always knew it hurt jeff for izzy to need me for everything but hey, i do provide the hands on care 24 hours a day, i figured it was just natural. so, i eventually picked her up and put her in bed. part of me wonders if this is because i have been putting her to bed awake and letting her cry it out. can she really think i don't love her as much as "fun" dad??? is it because i ignore atleast half her fits....daddy always takes her mind off what made her so mad to begin with???? i can't help but think i need to nurture her more because obviously her nature is to run to her dad. well, it was a long night with izzy waking repeatedly with a fever and needing milk (i could not imagine drinking milk with a fever) and annie coughing herself into a crying fit...i am going to put my feet up and enjoy the last few moments i get to share with my lap top!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

25 random things about me.....

if you are a facebook person you know this "note"....it is fun to read and learn random things about everyone.


1. I must turn the toiletpaper roll the correct direction...paper over the top not under. I have done it in other people's houses and in public restrooms.
2. I finished college...it took everything I had for 6 long years but I did it and have never used my degree.
3. I dream of a Master's degree...in what? Changes everytime I want to commit. Once I know...I will complete it.
4. I don't have very many close girlfriends, however, I love the ones that continue to put up with me and my over opinionated ways.
5. I am extremely grateful for my husband and all his hard work to create the business we run together. While it is stressful, it does give us each some freedom.
6. I love going to the movies. Anything except sci-fi and horror. I used to go EVERY sunday until I had children, now I am starting to go every other week.
7. I have an addiction to tv....I dvr way too many shows and get too caught up in the story lines.
8. I have always been a reader. I love books, Harlan Coben is a favorite.
9. I can not stop watching the Food Network. I dvr shows and never recreate any of the recipes. 10. I was in the restaurant business for almost a decade. Everything from waiting, menu setting, party planning, bartending and General Manager of one of Fort Worth's best.
11. Referring to #10 I want to one day open a small cozy breakfast/lunch place, one with a small daily changing menu and a place moms gather during school hours.
12. I love yoga, not the slow let me breathe and think too much stuff, but the hot room, sweat dripping off my chin and elbows full inversion classes.
13. When I run, I am a better person inside and out. It calms my nerves and gives me a place to turn to when I am lost.
14. I have been let down so many times in my life by those I love. It is why I tend to be stand offish.
15. I am not very close with my family, however, am learning how to accept and move forward. I do love and treasure the one I married into.
16. Coffee is what keeps me going...I can not survive without it. We were in Europe for 13 days before I found coffee. They drink shots of espresso, not venti drips.
17. FOOD< FOOD< FOOD...I talk about what we should have had, or what we will eat next. Especially sushi, I could eat it five times a week.
18. I love having my nephew live with us. I have made so many choices since he was born that revolved around his well-being. I am proud of how much he has changed in the past year.
19. I am one of those freaks who enjoys being pregnant. I don't complain about it, but try to push myself to do more with each one.
20. I always wanted children...lots of them. I have a hard time separating myself from our girls!21. I have been in "love" with my husband since 2nd grade. I may have even stalked him at one time. At our wedding my mother brought out class photos from elementary school where I had written all over them I would be Mrs. Jeff Longspaugh.
22. I never regret my life, only look for ways to make it better. I have a strong will and want more than what I grew up with and not just a financial safety net.
23. I enjoy red wine, not just enjoy I love to drink it. One glass will calm the roughest of days.
24. I love to bake....I will always volunteer to bring the dessert. I even bake with my two year old.
25. I am often cranky because my house is a wreck. I prefer it clean and orderly but know this is
near to impossible with a husband, 14yr old, 2 yr old and 1 yr old, not to mention the pets.

no one gets a freebie.....

so, i don't know how funny this is but i thought i would share the conversation that occurred here today....

"cade, time to get up for school, i am actually 15 minutes late on waking you up so hurry."

"whhhaaatttt....josh and everyone else are skipping today" eyes not open, head still turned into his pillow and growling about the light being on.

"josh and who"

"idk, josh and everybody"

"so really, josh is skipping school and you want to stay home and play xbox live with him ALL DAY LONG"

"aaahhhhh, just go, i will get up"

and he did get up twenty minutes later and of course was five minutes late for school. i don't get it, how does this almost 14 year old think he should be able to skip school because it will ice later here. as far as i am concerned if the school is open you are going. especially to math which is third period...i fight you to get up and go to tutoring because you don't want to study for your math test and your teacher is extremely kind in letting you make the grade up in tutoring. (though she did ask him the other day how much his new shoes cost.....still feeling a little uncomfortable with this one. maybe because according to cade and his friends his shoes are the best in all the school. my response, it is a good thing i made you do extra chores to earn the money for them, huh.)

so we will see what the weather does and maybe i will pick him up after lunch. but, i have to say it makes me extremely happy to make him miserable. ok, that sounds awful....i mean to say, i like ruining his over indulged, spoiled rotten attitude he tends to carry.

oh, and while i am on the subject. the next time he says something about jeff having to help him with the dishes i think his "big brother" jeff is going to blow up! i mean really please let me know if i am asking to much from him for daily chores.....dishes (unloaded and loaded), clean cat box (while i am preggos), straighten up room, pick underwear up out of bathroom and take out the trash. for the first time in his short life he does earn a weekly allowance and does not worry about the finances of the household. I WOULD THINK THE KID WOULD BE A BIT MORE GRATEFUL.

well, that is all i have to bitch about today...enjoy your stay at home day, especially if it is in the quiet while your kiddos had to go to school!

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

i found a time machine...

so, that may be a little misleading for a title but it really is a time machine. nye when everyone spent the night here my children were introduced to the magic of a sound machine. there was one in every room with children sleeping peacefully. annie slept through the night without her usual 4am wake up call. the very next week i stopped by brookstone and purchased my own baby sound machine. it has been in the girls room ever since....working mini (or really maxi) miracles. izzy started last week putting herself to bed in her room, actually wanting to go in there and go to sleep alone. she now naps in there (unless i make her go in our room because her and annie's nap are totally not in sync). the amazing part, is for the first time in her just over two years of age she lays down and does not cry for someone to go nite nite with her, she does not cry while tossing and turning, actually she may not even toss and turn anymore. but most importantly she stays in her bed all night long without even a whimper. i still put the gate up in the hall way in case she were to try and walk around in the night (i mainly do this because jeff and cade forget it is there and face plant every once in a while, kinda like i do over their shoes in the living room). as for annie, like i said if she wakes in the night she finds her own binki and goes back to sleep. the machine has also given me the confidence to put her down awake and let her go to sleep on her own too. i started last thursday at bed time and she cried for off and on for about twenty minutes, then the next night it was only five minutes and since it is only as i walk out of the room. as my courage builds daily, i put her down for her nap today like this and it was 15 minutes of crying off and on but she did it!
so, why do i call it a time machine of sorts...because i am not rocking annie for thirty minutes per nap and again at bedtime. the way i figure it i now have 1 1/2 extra hours of precious time a day which adds up to 10.5 hours a week and approx. 42 hours a month. catch my drift, i can use that time to read a book, blog, veg out in front of biggest loser or actually work, fold laundry and clean up after dinner.
on another note, we left the girls home with cade and his friend last friday night to go to dinner. annie was asleep before we left and izzy had just laid down....i had no guilt over asking a babci or momo to come over and sit for hours in the quiet house and we totally did not panic. cade's friend watches his almost 3 year old sister all the time so i felt he could assist cade if a problem were to arise. i also notified the neighbor that we would be gone just in case a purple golf cart full of girls were to show up looking to "hang out". it worked so well, that i plan to do it again sometime this weekend while jeff is gone for dinner and a movie with any of my girlfriends that do not have plans with their hubbies.
so, other than my work continuing to pile up next to the mountains of laundry that never seem complete, i am finally feeling good! i went to my dr appt yesterday and i am up to 7lb for this pregnancy and starting to panic. (damn that trip to the grocery store) so, i will be trying to get up early a few days a week to work out on my fancy collecting dust elliptical in my bedroom plus walk the loop and hit yoga or weights a few times a week. as motivation i asked jeff today if we could go to clearwater, florida for my birthday weekend in april. while i don't mind being preggos in a swimsuit (no, i am not one with the guts to wear a bikini) i do mind if my legs look the surface of mars.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

comfort comes in small packages....

so, i just received a call from my lovely ccr at my not so local chevy dealership regarding my suv i took back in this past tuesday. it appears they figured out the window shocks are not staying on because there is an issue with the balls welded to the body of the truck.....DID I NOT SUGGEST THIS THE FIRST TIME I BROUGHT IT IN! being this is not a problem that regularly occurs gm is shipping two 1/2" balls to the dealership which will take 3 to 5 business days from yesterday (not realizing that the mama with the brain so full of everything actually figured out that meant my truck was not dealt with on tueday but rather wednesday). i am not a sexist person but have to say, men outside of the grocery store do treat women differently. i deal with it everyday being that i help run a plumbing company...most contractors until they get to know me do not like it when they must talk to me not the "plumber".
anyhoo, ccr's next question, "are you comfortable in what we gave you to drive or would you like to bring it back and pick up your truck only to return it next tuesday?" HUMMMMM...let me think about this one.....do i want to lug my girls back to the dealership unstrap them, unstrap, bolt, anchor and all the jazz their carseats to move them back into my truck to re strap, bolt and anchor them in and then know i must do it again in four days??? NO DAMN WAY! i would need to be heavily medicated to think this is an okay solution. i did run the whole scenario past my ccr before confirming to him i would rather not and the buick enclave is a very nice vehicle for the time being.
so, speaking of the buick, we looked at them last year at the auto show and really liked the interior. the front end is a bit weird but it has grown on me in the past two days. however, the price was running closer to my larger suv and in the end we made a different choice. oh, if looking for a new car it was very helpful to attend the auto shop.....you really can do every thing except drive the car while there which helped in the dealership hop. but, i must say i LOVE the way this small suv drives...it drives like the lexus i had as a rental a few years back....it is quick, sharp, and tight (if these adjectives make sense to you...) i like it a whole lot more than the acadia. now don't get me wrong, i would not trade my truck for anything, not the lexus 470 we drove for two day or the mercedes r350 i drove for three day but if i did not think at the time one day (and soon than i thought) i would need to be able to access three carseats, i might have been persuaded to go for the 19 miles a gallon city driving buick. oh, wow, that jsut hit me i will have three car seats to unstrap, bolt and anchor if i must move them after june 1st. i may need to invest in a winery.......
on to other news....i am freaking out over the whole mess in connection to Timothy Geithner as treasury secretary! i am not saying i am totally clean on having always filed my taxes correctly...there is some lenience on how persons claiming tips have to file. however, i am not being chosen for such a high cabinet job! really, he did not have anyone telling him he had to pay 34K in taxes while working for the IMN (International Monetary Fund, had to look that one up). not to mention, as a lot of people do, he did not pay taxes on his household help and tried to claim the over night camp one of his kids attended was child care. seems to me this should all raise a big fat red flag to the senate confirmation team!
and now that it is all over the news...i would like to see president-elect obama's birth certificate myself. not sure why it matters but hey, if someone out there is questioning it, then just produce it and move forth on protecting our country. UNLESS there is a reason not too....i am just saying.
well, the girls are at my mother's today, and i went by the grocery store on my way back, however, i have not unload the almost $500 i spent (i have to shop more than once every two months, it gives me a heart attack) from the back of my oh, so cozy rental and jump on some of the paperwork stacking up in my open file, on the fax machine and in the guys turn in slot....damn i have a lot to do....

Sunday, January 11, 2009

oh, you want a perfect survey from me, FAT CHANCE....

so, while i have refrained from one of my bitchfest...i can not help it today, i have some things to get off my chest
to start i do really love my new suv truck...it is just over 6 months old now and well, i am sad on the days i don't drive anywhere. i religiously check all the "stats" that come with new vehicles and yada, yada....however, (you knew that was coming right) the back hatch window has a bad habit of popping off the shock arm, ok, so now i understand why maybe it is hard to understand what i am saying, the shock actually pops of the part that is welded to the body of the truck, therefore, the glass coming slamming down on my head. i must note, i am pretty good at controlling my "words" around our girls, i don't want my 2 year old going to preschool dropping "f" bombs, but i have let a few slip when this happens. it is hard not too...i honestly feel around on the top of my head for blood because there is this wet sensation that occurs after it hits me. after this happened three days in a row (why do i keep using the window you say, i guess i fear over using the automatic door when i am running around with the open and close two dozen times in an hour). so i made an appointment at our friendly chevrolet dealership to have the problem rectified. now i am a bit of a pain the in ass...i want a car, i do not have time to sit in the lobby with everyone else and wait hour upon hour. not to mention the two hell uns i tote around with me everyday. anyhoo, i called to make the appt over a week in advance (plenty of time for them to arrange a car for me) and while they had my truck i wanted the gps jeff gave me for christmas hard wired through the dashboard. all the cords make me crazy....too much stuff in my way for the random i need my tweezers right this second digging i do while driving. and then the genius in me thought, "hey, the carseats will be in the rental, so i should have them clean my truck too".
first, we arrived to the dealership and after showing one guy what the issue was with the back window, i finally meet my "customer care representative". by this point i have the stroller out of the back, annie strapped in (kinda, only part of it fits around her cubby little body) and one of the two carseats removed. which with all the anchors, straps and tightening you do to get them totally secure, it is a total pain in my ass to remove them. and my new ccr comes up to me to let me know there is a problem....conversation went something like this....
"mrs. longspaugh, i am afraid we have a problem, we are out of cars and enterprise across the street says it will be 2 to 3 hours till they have one"
***blood starting to peculate....i am pushing stroller back and forth, asking izzy to stand still and silence my phone which has just begun to ring repeatedly.
"well, this is why i made my appt. over a week ago so this would not happen (again)"
"yes, well the ice storm yesterday wiped everyone out"
"oh, the small storm that hit dallas harder because i drove to and from weatherford yesterday twice to drop off and pick up my girls and never really say a problem or accident"
"well, so we can reschedule or you can wait in the lobby till a car is available"
"well, see this does not work for me...(breathing, or rather trying to) i drove 40 minutes out here, unpacked my truck, unloaded my children, arranged my day and now you want me to either wait in the lobby without snacks and milk for my girls or pack every thing back up and try again another day......i don't think so....(and this is where the bitch in me finally came out) YOU my ccr should have looked at your appt for the day when you arrived at 7am and double checked that i have a car available as i explained to you on the phone that this is an ordeal for me. you need to go back and find me something, this is not an acceptable solution. i hate to say this but we did buy three trucks from your dealership in the past 12 months.".....
and there is was....my ace in the deck....the one that made jeff say "no you did not"....but, yes i did!
next thing i know our salesman...young guy who bales hay on the side, looks as if my children scare the shit out of him,, all the while pretending to think they are cute; comes over with keys to a 2009 acadia.....at this point i do feel like i played the bitch card but don't really regret it.
so i proceed to put both carseats into my loaner as i explain to my sales rep i really did not want to have to be such a bitch....it is not in my blood (ha, ha, ha, jeff spits his coffee right now, that is if by chance he reads my blog)
so, two days later i pick up my truck......first, i realize the detail guys did not clean under the back seat (the main reason i wanted it cleaned) and i know i told my ccr this is what i really needed. second, the following day when i went to turn on my gps it would not turn on, and finally, i am in the parking lot at central market, i pop the window in the back to grab my cart cover and WHAM i am hit in the back of the head by my fucking window! i yell a couple "f" bombs while trying to smile because izzy is looking at me through the window and think....i am calling my ccr right now and giving him a few strong words.
so, i am driving my truck, my two children, and my busy ass self back to weatherford this tuesday to try again.......

oh, i almost forgot, while jeff is putting everything back into my truck last week and i am trying to pay my ticket (cleaning and gps not included in warranty) my lovely ccr approaches me to explain about the survey i will receive in the mail.....and "if you do not mark completely satisfied to every question it is considered an "f" or failing grade against him, therefore, if i have a problem please discuss it with him". (his words exactly) needless to say i reminded him of that damn survey when i called from the central market parking lot........

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

a little sap before your morning coffee....

CAUTION: if you are easy to tears or hormonal (as i tend to be most days) please move forward and do not read the following blog........

so, tonight after what started as a "rough evening" around our house....having a really hard time with the whole almost 14 life dealt me a bad deck attitude/smart mouth/ i know more than you...tude we have floating around here! my new reaction i have decided is going to be "go to your room, no x-box, you may watch cnn only and stay away from me because you are on my NERVES"! however, i ended the night by meeting a few girlfriends at the movies. and what else do we ladies like to watch...but the sappiest, how hard can i cry in public movies ever, which bring me to the following.

dear fandango,

i watched a movie tonite that reminded me of you my sweet pup. as you are coming up on 10 years old let me flaunt my love for you to the few (and probably just my bnl because he wonders how crazy i really am) readers of my blog. you came into my life with my husband...he picked you from the litter and he is the one whom credit goes to for your wonderful training. i remember the day i pulled into the driveway in azle to be greeted by this "big" jumping licking dog and with sarcasms asked jeffie if you would eat my cats seeing as i was planning on moving into the house. from the beginning you amazed me with your sweet nature...i even began taking you to the nature center for my runs. your love of food became very evident when we discovered you had eaten 3/4 of a chocolate cake made with real heavy duty chocolate....luckily you survived it. then came the first mishap, a pair of beautiful heels i bought for a wedding, only to be worn once since you seemed to love the taste of the right one. from there you became my guardian when i moved to northside and the house with losy locks. i truly believe the thought of you being behind the door kept me safe and many a knockers away. you captured my heart when your daddy left for a four day weekend in las vegas leaving you behind with me....until the 3 am emergency room trip i made because you had been eating trash (not all in my care) and had a stomach the size of three watermelons. after that weekend you stayed with me while jeff went to alaska for three weeks and then to florida for two months. during this time i loved every minute we spent walking/running the trinity river, cuddling in my bed, and of course hanging out on the front porch (my northside neighbors also enjoyed this). i believe 40% of the reason i followed jeff to florida was because i missed you so......


we had six amazing years just the three of us, and a lot of the time just the two of us.....for every mile we walked along the trinity i have thrown 15 sticks to match. you accepted izzy when she was born and would not leave my side the last few weeks when i was preggos. you have graciously let annie pull your tail and try to climb on top of you. you have caused many emergency doctor visits with your "eating" habits, which includes the toaster you chewed up for a few crumbs (remember you lost that $600 crown on your front tooth doing this), and your habit for baby formula drove me crazy especially when i would rush in the door needing a bottle for a screaming izzy only to find the empty can on the floor.
now i could go on and on about all our moments together but i mostly want you to know every car ride whether 10 min or 10 hours with you hanging out in the front seat, every hike through dinosaur valley, every stick i have thrown, every treat you had to do numerous tricks for i will always treasure. your doggie smile lights up my worst days. if there has been one person there for me consistently over the past 8 years it has been you...when i am happy and when i am sad.
i promise to spend more time with you...walk you most days (even if it is just a quick loop around the golf course), throw a stick, rub your ears, and stop to pet you while whispering in your ear what a wonderful dog you are to me. i will make more of an effort to let you up on my side of the bed when you have been pushed of jeff's. you fandango are more than just some dog to me, you have been my best friend and the day you leave us will be the toughest yet.


i love you sweet pup.......

Monday, January 5, 2009

quiet start to the new year...

well, i don't have a whole lot to say....maybe just some quick thoughts...
a. i have been sick to my stomach for the past 2 1/2 days...thought it was a bug but then it went away most of yesterday to return with a vengeance around 1am this morning. can't quite shake the feeling that the room is spinning. it may be a preggos thing...but, i am in my 18th week, i should not be sick anymore, right???
b.. cooked lobsters (whole) for the first time nye...and wow, were they amazing! we did a steak and lobster combo for the couples that came over for the evening. should say, if you are thinking of boiling water in stock pots better start them several hours prior to wanting the bubbles to become rapid. ended up putting the pots in the fire outback, may have made them all that much better.
c.. girls are at my mother's so i can work today...but, can't get dear husband out of the office and it is too much work trying to do what i need to on the laptop.
d..heater in the front of the house went out last night, so trying to keep it warm with the fireplace. atleast we were able to sleep on the on the warm side.
e.. cade still can not get out the door in time in the mornings...guess, i have to be a big ole' bitch and make this almost 14yr old go to bed at 9pm! what else am i to do, i already wake him up 30 minutes earlier...
f...why can i not use a garlic press??? i have to hand chop it every time.
g..the winter sure makes me want a cocktail...not a glass of wine (which i will do every now and then), not a cold beer, but a something that warms my throat.
h..annie is sleeping better, finally....i did adjust my schedule which actually now goes along with her natural schedule. down side is it is difficult for me to find the right time to leave the house for running around.
i..i love christmas cards..thank you! and a big thanks to my husband for pushing us all yesterday to get everything put away and the garage cleaned out once and for all!
j.. hooray to me for only gaining 2lb so far this pregnancy! so much better than the first one...
k..our baby blazer is still home...he even got out once and came back to the driveway so jeff could coax him in with food! while we certainly missed him, not sure my really old cats did.
l.. thinking if my husband does not give up the office i might go catch a movie...since i don't have the girls i should do something, right!

i hope to post christmas/nye pictures tonight....